Monday, May 7, 2007

We're Not Gonna Take It


First Buby is finally cutting teeth. Poor little guy. Now Mommy gets what all the fussiness was about last Thursday. Oh dumb Mommy.

I have been wrestling with pumping breast milk since he was born. I really, really, really wanted to go a full year. It looks like I am going to fall short. I can't take much more of this pumping. I am in pain all the time and my poor nips have been bleeding everyday for at least a month. I present this to you because I know it is time to quit. I need to quit. I also think Buby needs my full attention. He too looks at the pump with distaste when I hook up. Time to put quality of time above my milk. I am not one of those who feel formula is bad. I know with the refulx bm is better. I am sure he will survive. I have to put this out there to make myself stick to this and not be swayed by guilt. Yes, tears have been shed over this issue. It is very difficult for me. Overall I want my time and my boobs back. It's been a good run. My supply is dropping faster than GW's approval ratings. I am tired of swilling various herbal teas and pills to try to keep it going. Funny that in my prime I was pumping 70+ oz a day. Thanks to a power outage my reserves are gone. I am going to take a month (maybe, I may not last that long) to freeze some extra, then drop from 3 to 2 to 1 pump. Then finito. I look forward to it and feel a little sad. The decision has been made. My pediatrician is just going to have to kiss my knits. She is VERY heavy on pushing bm for at least a year. If I get too much grief I will change to a new Dr. I don't really think it matters what anyone else believes I should do with my boobs. Thats that.


Vicky said...

You have to do what is right for you. It's hard when pressure is applied from friends, family or the medical field but you must do what is in the best interest for all of you and what your gut tells you.
Hang in there sister!

Diane's Playground said... clearly I am not a mom no matter how close Luna makes me...Cuz I was laughing during that post...NOT AT YOU!! I totally felt for you...but the way you wrote it cracked me you were going to wean yourself off crack or something...with the 3 pump 2 pump 1 pump finito business. LOL

Read your comment on V's blog about Mom's day..want to call W. and give him a piece of my mind? LOL In all seriuosness, I do have high hopes that W. will surprise you with something WONDERFUL that makes you happy.

Love ya!!!